Welcome to the wild world of TikTok divorce advice: where strangers with ring lights and zero legal training confidently hand out tips that could absolutely ruin your life in and out of court. Look, we get it. TikTok is entertaining. When it comes to ending a marriage though, you might want to get your legal advice from… a lawyer, not an “influencer.” Let’s break down some of the most viral nonsense our Chicago, IL sports and entertainment family lawyer who has been in the business for fifteen years has seen and what actually happens in the real world.
1. “Drain The Bank Account Before Filing”
There’s nothing like kicking off your divorce by giving the judge a reason to immediately not like you.
Draining a joint account before filing might sound like a clever “get ahead of it” move on TikTok until you realize you’ve just gone from ex to the person everyone in the courtroom is side-eyeing hard.
Seriously, don’t do this. Judges will not be amused. The court won’t see it as “protecting yourself.” They’ll see it as hostile and shady.
In many states, once a divorce is filed or even just anticipated, there are automatic financial restraints that kick in. These prevent either party from moving, hiding, or draining marital funds.
Violating these can get you slapped with a restraining order, sanctioned by the court, or put you in a really bad position when it comes time to divide assets.
So instead of walking in with a clear head and a strong case, now you’re explaining why you emptied the account and Venmo’d your cousin before anyone knew what was happening.
And no, “I saw it on TikTok” will not fly as a defense.
This isn’t the time to experiment with financial stunts. You don’t want your divorce lawyer handing you off to a civil litigator (or worse, someone with “defense” in their title).
Bottom line: Don’t poke the legal system. It may not get you arrested, but it will get you wrecked in court.
2. If They Cheat, You Get Everything
You’ve been wronged. We get it.
Unfortunately, the law doesn’t really care how many DMs they sent or who they were “just friends” with.
Most states, including Illinois, are no-fault divorce states, which means courts don’t factor in infidelity when dividing property or deciding support even if you are a business owner. That’s not to say it’s emotionally insignificant, but it’s mostly irrelevant legally.
You don’t “win” the house, the car, the retirement account, or the kids just because they cheated. You might feel morally entitled to everything, but divorce courts deal in equity, not emotion.
So no, you don’t get to take them for everything just because they couldn’t stay faithful. You still have to follow the law, and that law often doesn’t hand out revenge settlements.
3. Hide Your Assets In Crypto Or NFTs.
There’s always someone online claiming they “moved everything to a cold wallet” and the courts will never find it.
Let’s just say… they will.
Hiding assets during divorce isn’t a clever hack. It’s a great way to destroy your case from the inside out instead.
No matter if it’s real estate, stock options, or a collection of JPEG monkeys, failing to disclose your assets will blow up in your face the moment the other side figures it out (and if they have a good lawyer, they will).
It’s not a crime per se, but it is a fast way to lose all credibility in court. And once that’s gone, everything you say, on every issue, comes under fire.
Courts are increasingly savvy when it comes to digital assets. Forensic accountants and legal teams know how to trace crypto wallets, DeFi investments, NFTs, and all the other “sneaky” things people think are invisible.
If you do get caught (and most people do), don’t be surprised when your “hidden” wallet becomes Exhibit A. Judges don’t only punish deception; they will start second-guessing everything else you’ve claimed.
Trying to hide money is never worth it. You will get caught, the long-term consequences are brutal, and no NFT is going to protect you from a judge who now thinks you’re trying to pull a fast one.
4. Represent Yourself To Save Money
This one sounds reasonable until you realize you’re basically trying to perform brain surgery on yourself with a YouTube tutorial.
When kids, real assets, or income disparities are involved, trying to DIY your divorce is one of the fastest ways to lose more money than you ever imagined.
You’re not just dealing with your ex. You’re up against their lawyer, a highly complex court system, strict deadlines, and the emotional chaos of watching your life get dissected in legal language.
And yes, good divorce lawyers cost money. We’re not going to pretend they don’t.
But you want to know what’s more expensive?
- Agreeing to a terrible settlement because you didn’t know better
- Missing key deadlines and having your case thrown out
- Failing to properly value and divide assets
- Losing parenting time or custody due to procedural mistakes
- Spending the next five years trying to fix what you messed up in a mediation
Saving a buck upfront by not hiring a lawyer often turns into spending way more later just to clean up the damage.
If your future is on the line, don’t gamble it to save on legal fees because in divorce, trying to be cheap almost always turns out to be VERY expensive.
5. Don’t Sign Anything Until You Get Everything You Want.
This one is pitched like it’s empowering. In reality, it’s how you turn a divorce into a financial disaster.
Divorce isn’t a game you “win.” It’s a negotiation. You come to a settlement.
Refusing to compromise because you think you’re owed everything will just keep you locked in court and drain your time, energy, and bank account.
This attitude leads to prolonged litigation, legal fees piled up as high as Mount Everest, and an exhausted judge who’s now watching you like a hawk for being unreasonable.
Judges respect practicality and good-faith efforts to resolve issues, not “I want it all” demands wrapped in entitlement and egotism.
A proper divorce settlement is walking away with what you need so you can actually move on with your life, not every single thing you want.
6. There’s No Child Support If You Don’t See Your Kids.
Flat-out false.
Child support isn’t a reward or punishment based on visitation. It’s meeting the child’s needs.
You can have zero parenting time and still owe support.
This TikTok myth confuses custody and support, two legally separate issues. Courts don’t care if you haven’t seen your child in months, AKA you could still be responsible for contributing to their upbringing.
Trying to use parenting time as leverage to get out of paying support will only make things worse. Judges see right through that and don’t appreciate it.
And if you can be present in your child’s life but choose not to, consider yourself a deadbeat parent and understand the court won’t reward you for that.
TikTok isn’t where you should build your entire divorce strategy. Some of the advice out there sounds good in a 15-second clip, but it will leave you with long-term consequences that can take 5 years to clean up.
Divorce is messy enough, so don’t let bad advice make it worse.
Get your guidance from someone who’s done this countless times in real courtrooms with real lives on the line, not someone who filmed a “hot take” from the front seat of their car.
And if you’re not sure whether something you’ve seen online is legit, ask a real lawyer before you act on it.
Just know that “I saw it on TikTok” won’t be a valid defense. Contact Merel Family Law today to work with our attorneys who have helped over 5,500 clients.
