Delay is a weapon. In the high-stakes world of high net worth divorce, it is rarely accidental.
We see it constantly: one spouse refuses to sign a basic engagement letter, reschedules the same meeting three times, or forgets to send over the bank statements for the third month in a row. They are often executing a legal strategy.
They are banking on status quo bias, which is that deep-seated psychological itch to just keep things exactly as they are because things are good as is and change could be to their detriment. They also think that divorce is exhausting. They hope that if they stall long enough, you will get litigation fatigue and accept a bad deal just to make the emails stop.
Dragging your feet can actively destroy your legal standing. The clock is not neutral. Depending on where you live, the passage of time is actively shifting the leverage against you. If you are in need of representation for your divorce case, contact our Chicago, IL complex divorce lawyer today.
ILLINOIS: THE NEW RULES
In Illinois, the strategy of stalling has historically been used to hold children hostage for money. A spouse would say something like, “I won’t agree to the parenting schedule unless you give me a bigger share of the brokerage account.”
Effective 2025, the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act (IMDMA) has been updated to kill this tactic.
- Immediate finality: New rules establish that a parenting plan or allocation judgment is considered a final order for appeal and enforcement purposes, even if the financial side of the divorce isn’t done yet.
- Bifurcation: This allows the court to bifurcate (split) the case. We can now go to the judge and say, “Your Honor, the parenting issues are resolved. Enter the Judgment for Allocation of Parental Responsibilities now.”
The Result: The judge enters the parenting order. The custody fight is over. Your spouse instantly loses their leverage. They can no longer dangle access to the children as a bargaining chip for the financial negotiations because the parenting deal is already inked and enforceable.
THE FINANCIAL BURN RATE
Beyond custody, delay burns cash at a rate that would make a venture capitalist blush. In a high net worth divorce, assets are complex. Business valuations, real estate appraisals, and forensic accounting reports all have a shelf life.
If your spouse stalls for a year, that $25,000 business valuation we paid for is worthless. It’s stale. We have to pay to do it again.
- The cost of inaction: We have seen couples spend $50,000 in legal fees fighting over a $20,000 difference in furniture simply because one side refused to respond to emails.
- Dissipation risks: The longer the case drags, the longer a spender spouse has to improperly spend marital funds, which forces us to chase that money later.
If you sense your spouse is stalling, you cannot afford to be patient. Patience is what gets you stuck with a permanent weekend visitation schedule in Michigan or a stale business valuation in Illinois. We don’t wait for them to be ready. We file motions, set deadlines, and push the case to a resolution.
MICHIGAN: THE ECE DANGER ZONE
If you are in Michigan, time is your enemy because of a specific legal doctrine called the Established Custodial Environment (ECE).
This is the most critical concept in Michigan custody law. The court doesn’t only look at who is a good parent. They look at the stability of the child’s life. The ECE is the environment where the child naturally looks for guidance, discipline, comfort, and the necessities of life.
The Trap: Let’s say you move out of the marital home to keep the peace while the divorce is pending. You agree to a temporary informal schedule where you see the kids every other weekend, just for now, while you negotiate. Then, your spouse starts stalling. They delay the mediation. They delay the discovery. Six months go by.
You have walked into a trap.
By letting that temporary arrangement sit for six months, you may have inadvertently allowed an ECE to solidify with the other parent.
- Before the ECE exists: The burden of proof to set a schedule is a preponderance of the evidence (51% likely).
- After the ECE exists: The court legally cannot change that established environment unless there is “clear and convincing evidence” that a change is in the child’s best interest.
“Clear and convincing” is an incredibly high bar to clear. By stalling, your spouse has effectively rigged the game. They turned a temporary nice guy agreement into a permanent court order because you let the clock run too long.
For representation with your divorce case, contact Merel Family Law today.
